But I was neither doing them OR myself any favors by prolonging the agony...
I had so much affection for clothes that I would never wear again. Acknowledging at age 55, I doubted that I would wear straight skirts above my knee with black opaque hose and black clunky shoes and those matching little sweater sets from the late '90s. Think Meg Ryan in You've Got Mail or refresh your memory here:
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=96gRJxIGa5A]
But what's with my attachment to these dyed, woven, fibers made to keep me from having to wear fig leaves?
Oh for the days of fitting into sizes 8 and below! Was that what was bothering me about this?
Well...I think for the most part I had accepted that awhile back. Then I realized they were attached to moments in my life...I wore this on my trip to San Diego...or I remember wearing this when I first met so-and-so...oh, this was the sweater I had on when I dared to re-enter college to finish my degree after a 30-year break.
These weren't clothes...this wasn't about a size...these were attached to memories.
Like these stone-washed straight-legged jeans and ribbed turtleneck that I wore when Lydia and I went to see Rascal Flatts sitting in the second row in a small high school auditorium for 10 bucks...a benefit for people with disabilities...and my daughter was thrilled that I took her picture with Joe Don.
Wow...then there was this skirt and sweater...a chill ran down my spine...
I bought those at Casual Corner...
I also had this on when I learned at 9:00 a.m. on September 11, 2001, that our country was under attack...
And used the skirt as a drape for this still I made commemorating the 10th anniverary... Saying goodbye to this would be like throwing away a Bible, something sacred, a part of my self, a poignant moment of history...It was a symbol of loss, of unity, and a country's resilience...and the preciousness and fragility of life and freedom. No, this would remain...
So these goodbyes were far from what I expected...they were remembrances of days of my life...of God's faithfulness...and God's mercies. Gratitude changes everything.
With gratitude,
